• scissors
    February 8th, 2017HARTHART-Empire Network, reorganization

    All my sites are completely hosted in Canada now. Woohoo!



    Last June 2016 I moved one of my hosting accounts from Bluehost (affiliate link) to SKGOLD (affiliate link) Hosting, here in Canada. I documented this and mentioned which sites were moved in this blog post www.hart-empire.com/2016/06/24/tip-how-to-fix-an-error-occurred-while-processing-this-directive/.

    Well .. I had 4 other accounts at Hostgator (affiliate link) that were expiring all around the same time at the end of the year December 31, 2016, and my goal to move them to Canada was the same. Beginning November 15, 2016 I started to move each of these account to the Canadian hosting company SKGOLD finalizing my choice on Black Friday November 24, 2016 when they were offering a 2-for-1 hosting sale for the first year! Since the move .. I haven’t really done anything, except clean up the four accounts with respect to plugins, loading times, and other fix other issues that may have come up after moving .. since, one of the accounts was my bloated “PetLvr” (LVR) group of sites that have been going on since May 2005 and has over 6,700 posts and a huuuuuuuge database!

    I am also in the process of converting most of the sites from blogs – which, my blogging hasn’t really really much to talk about in the past few years – to “E-commerce Stores with Blogs”. I have been testing platforms and cleaning up old stores in my “Shops of HART Market” stores, and testing new themes. I also noticed that in doing many of my clean up and changes that some (or, all of a few certain regular themes that I have been using) appear to be broken. My plan is to first decide on the BEST theme to use, that mimick’s my entire HART EMPIRE NETWORK philosophy, and standardize one theme for everything! At least, that is my plan.

    In the meantime .. I hope you are patient with me … my goal is to have everything ready by “Back To School” time … (I am an accountant during the day and gearing up for income tax season and year ends).

    PS: And, speaking of moving 100% of my 57 sites and domains from Bluehost/Hostgator to the Canadian Server SKGOLD HOSTING … if you are looking for some helpful advice on making the move yourself .. here’s a site and person that got in touch with me and has a site just willing to do that! His guides and reviews are very helpful or, at least gives you something to think about when pursuing more information.

    One caution, as pointed out in the disclaimer of his website:

    Disclosure: Our website receives compensation from the companies whose products we recommend and because of it, we are able to provide Free help with setting up your blog. We tested and used most of the web hosting sites and domain registrars recommended here.

    ( i.e. most links related to hosting and domain reviews are affiliate linked, and they will make a commission if you sign up through their links, and will generally override previously clicked links or referrals from other sources before you click over here. Don’t get me wrong – this is common around the internet to help support bloggers and website to providing and maintaining information, like this, that is generally helpful and useful and around when you need it!)

    Check them out! If you chat with anyone from that site, or with their Social Media accounts … tell ’em HART sent you!

    firstsiteguide.com/change-hosting/

    “…. the guide intended for web newbies to explain the terminology, issues and procedures they need to know in order to successfully transfer their website from one host to another.

  • scissors
    June 24th, 2016HARTHART-Empire Network, reorganization

    Floridaserversfront1

    I have been on the internet and with websites since March 1995 and blogging since May 2005. I started small with local hosting platforms, and then expanded each to a point where I consolidated all my sites and blogs to a super dedicated server in May 2007. By 2012 I began to downsize and broke up my dedicated server into 5 separate and smal and cheaper shared hosting accounts … one at BLUEHOST (affiliate link) and four at HOSTGATOR (affiliate link). Both Bluehost and Hostgator (and a bunch of other hosting companies) are all owned by the same “Endurance International Group” and that always irked me.

    My Bluehost server holds about 20-25% of my sites, and expires July 29, 2016 but I decided to move all my sites to Canadian servers when one of the sites had a little traffic this month and Bluehost deactivated my account. It turned out to be an old plugin I had (Spam Karma 2) that I never removed that was causing the problems and my account was reactivated right away – but, with the US Exchange rate rising .. I finally decided to move my sites back to a Canadian Hosted server. My Hostgator sites are not renewed until December 31, 2016 so I plan to just move those over the fall at the convenience of my time.

    SKGOLD HOSTING aka CANADIAN WEB HOSTING

    After review and talking to various other people I respect, I decided to go with SKGOLD HOSTING (affiliate Link). If you want to read up on the, and considering your own move of servers .. check them out: www.skgoldhosting.com/about.html (no affiliate link)

    These are the sites I moved … how are they doing? I notice they are not slow or downtime like they were on Bluehost … but – I just got them migrated today 😀

    1800hart.com
    1800hart.tv
    2yrd.com
    62-151.com
    abitpac.com
    andyouwill.com
    andyouwill.net
    andyouwill.org
    battlingforhealth.com
    battlingforhealth.net
    battlingforhealth.org
    bettesinger.com
    callhart.com
    hart-empire.com (this site)
    hart-empire-network.com
    hart-network.com
    hartleybsinger.com
    hbsmc.com
    jmskwared.com
    singer-empire.com
    singer-network.com
    the-singers.com

    MIGRATING TO ANOTHER SERVER IS HELL

    Migrating to another server is hell .. if you have to do it yourself, or expensive if you have to pay another to do it for you. However, if you have access to the cPanel .. (and especially if you subscribe to a daily backup application like “Site Pro Backup”) the cPanel has an option to make a FULL CPANEL BACKUP. What this does, is creates a backup in a .tar.gz format of all your files, databases, settings, add-ons, and well, everything! that is in your old server, that your new server can come and scoop and download and install into the new server.

    For my Bluehost account – it took about 48 hours to get their technical support to finally make a good and full cPanel backup that wasn’t corrupt and was in a compressed mode (which took extra time) and ended up being about 15.13 GB in size. Restoration on the new server took about 4 hours to download in the first place, and that was about midnight … and by 10am this morning most of the sites were up and running.

    [an error occurred while processing this directive]

    I was finding out that when I went to about half of the sites .. I was getting the above message – especially when I tried to log in to the dashboard of my wordpress files to update plugins and such and give a good test.

    Here is how to fix this problem:

    * Make a backup or in your FTP program rename your .htaccess file to something like .htaccess-before-move-hosting
    * Go to SETTINGS.
    * Go to PERMALINKS.
    * Notice which settings you have – (usually “postname” or “month/name”)
    * Choose PLAIN and common settings for Permalinks and SAVE.
    * Then, re-select your original “postname” (or whatever) setting and SAVE

    That’s pretty much it. What this does is create or overwrite the existing .htaccess file and make it work with the server and site. You should be cautious however, and compare what was created with the .htaccess-before-move-hosting file, to see if you need to add or modify the existing file with extra security and safety features.

    Your Welcome!

    HART

    ~~~~~~~
    image source: Wikipedia

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  • scissors
    July 7th, 2012HARTHART-Empire Network, Hmmmm Things

    In anticipation of HART’s New Computer expected to arrive July 17, 2012 … I hope to resume with “The HART Podcast” series! My first podcast #000.1 was June 18, 2008 and my last podcast was #000.4 March 4, 2010. I know that doesn’t sound like a “series” but, I hope to get this going again, since I have purchased a new microphone, headphone, and web camera and an *awesome* Dell Computer with 16GB RAM memory!!

    PS Thanks for visiting, and here are a few gratuitous French Maid pictures I found on Flickr

    French MaidsAnyway … I figured rather than include music I do not have the rights to include in a podcast, and have no sound … I thought I would try and pick some “sexy” background music to make ME more interesting! Thanks to google search, and me being an economical type of Future Podcaster … I did find and purchased two different tracks from MelodyLoops.com that I plan to incorporate into each and every podcast. Maybe I’ll put one at the beginning and one at the end? Or, maybe just loop them over and over until the podcast is over? They only cost me $10.00 USD each, and I thought that was a reasonable price for a “Melody Loop”. What do you think?

    Let Me Know In The Comments Which You Prefer Best!

    1. ‘Only Trust Your Heart’ by Mike Nowa

    This track is 00m:31s and is looped into a 10 minute track below:
    [audio: melodyloops-only-trust-your-heart-10m.mp3]

    Single Loop
    [audio: only-trust-your-heart.mp3]

    2. ‘Mountain Blues’ by Pavel Svejentsev

    This track is 01m:12s and is looped into a 10 minute track below:
    [audio: melodyloops-mountain-blues-10m.mp3]

    Single Loop
    [audio: mountain-blues.mp3]

    You can listen to my previous Podcasts here: The HART Podcast” series //

    So?
    – Which one was your favorite?
    – I looped them into 10 minutes to be sure to give you a listen to how it would sound over and over and over again! Did you get sick of one or both or none of the above?
    – What if the first (without loop) started each of my podcasts, then the second looped over and over until the podcase was over?
    – comments? suggestions?

    PS – do you podcast? What do you do for background and/or intro music? // Thanks 😀

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  • scissors
    June 29th, 2012HARTHmmmm Things, Home Office

    Dell Desktop #1

    In October 2002 I purchased online a “Dimension 8200” Computer from Dell Canada. It was a super computer, because, if memory serves me correctly, I took the online price of about $1,700.00 and aggressively upgraded it into a super duper $4,500.00 computer! I took the 4 year option and my final payment was in October 2006.

    Dell Laptop #2

    In June 2007 I purchased online a “Latitude D820” Laptop Computer from Dell Canada. It wasn’t a super laptop-computer, but I did take the cost from about $999.00 to about $2,400.00 before taxes mostly getting more memory and storage space plus, a few accessories. I also took the 4 year option to lease instead of buy.

    In both cases, I was happy with my purchase because I needed the computer or laptop desperately for my busines, which I couldn’t afford to outright buy at the time, and both have served me well! In hindsight, I probably shouldn’t have extended it to 48 month terms, because DELL CANADA FINANCE charges you 28.99% annual rate of interest in their amortization and you almost end up paying about 70% more for the cost of the product in the long term. However, I write off my lease payments for income taxes and if I didn’t pay Dell .. who else would I pay? Capital One? Revenue Canada?

    Best Buy Desktop #3

    Somewhere in between these two purchases, late 2003 or early 2004 … I purchased a second computer for the house. We called it the “SIMS 2” computer, and I would also store backups of my work on it. It was:

    HP Compaq Presario Computer
    AMD Anthlon(tm) 64 Processor +3500
    2.19 GHz, 960 MB of RAM

    >> nothing special It was configured for a multi-media enviroment and had 180 GB hard drive.

    Well … On February 27, 2007 My first Dell Dimension 8200 Crashed and that being the day before deadline of T4 Season (February 28th) I switched computers and started to use the Compaq Presario as my main computer. In June 2007 .. I actually went online to the Dell site to purchase a suitable (read: “Better”) desktop computer for my home office, but instead was starting up with the blogging since mid 2005 and trying a new business plan to me more … ‘roving’ so I thought a laptop would serve me better than upgrading to a new desktop, and so I did.

    Well … this Compaq Presario works – but, is a nightmare for me. The 960MB Ram is just not enough with the Facebooks, Pinterest, Empire Avenue, and MS DOS and other G/L Accounting programs I use, not to mention when I use Open Office or Excel or Word Processing programs. However, the absolute worse is my Zone Alarm anti-virus/spyware control program I use (which is free from my ISP) and it is constantly checking and updating for new virus definitions and such. Basically, a full scan of this computer with this 1GB RAM and 2.19GHz processor takes about 13 hours to complete, so in the meantime .. every single file viewed uploaded downloaded clicked on is checked by the anti-virus program and causes memory up to almost half my RAM. It’s just crazy if I accidentally try to click a new tab or try loading another program in the middle – and didn’t notice – and keep on clicking and clicking and making things worse! I always get the white screen of death and time out. It’s Nuts!

    I can’t tell you how unproductive it is … but, even my wife knows it is horrible, and most of the time she is just loading her GPS Watch results onto the Garmin site!

    Well .. It’s About Time I Bought Another Desktop Computer #4!

    I just purchased a new computer from Dell Canada online .. leased over 3 years. Here are the specs!

    225-2645 XPS 8500
    313-6138 NO SPEAKER REQUESTED,DIMENSION
    317-9193 3rd Generation Intel Core i7-3770
    317-9212 16GB DDR3 SDRAM at 1600MHz
    318-1677 16X DVD+/-RW
    318-1872 XPS 8500/ black Chassis
    318-2249 Integrated 7.1 with WAVE MAXXAudio 4
    320-3038 AMD Radeon HD 7570 1GB GDDR5
    320-3151 Dell ST2420L 24″ Full HD LED Monitor,CDT
    330-1158 DELL USB 6-BUTTON LASER MOUSE,I/S/XDT
    331-5795 US Power Cord
    331-5886 Localization parts-English/French
    331-6145 XPS localiztaoin parts
    331-6146 Dell KB213 Wired Multimedia Keyboard
    331-6149 SHIP,XPS,L10,FXCN,8500,DAO
    331-6176 DELL RESOURCE DVD,BACK-UP,XPS8500
    342-4107 2TB SATA Hard Drive 7200 RPM
    410-0547 ADOBE ACROBAT X READER MLANG,CDT
    410-0571 MCAFEE 11, 36 MONTH, CDT
    421-5693 Win 7 Home Prem 64 SP1, Eng, No Med,CDT
    421-7190 Dell SRV Software 1703
    421-7997 No PDVD
    421-8242 Software Cycle 23
    430-3628 Integrated 10/100/1000 Ethernet
    430-4735 DW1703 802.11b/g/n, BT4.0
    410-0450 MICROSOFT OFFICE STARTER 2010,CDT
    954-1820 PPS TECH SPT,XPS DT,BAND 1,INIT YR
    992-7983 HW WRTY+SVC,XPSDT1NBDM1,UNY,INIT,REL
    992-8003 NBD OS,XPSDT1NBDM1,UNY,INIT YR,REL
    009-6800 SHIPPING FEE
    950-9797 NO WARRANTY,YRS 2/3(DIM,INSP,NBD)
    Subtotal: $1,364.99
    Shipping and Handling: $0.00
    GST/HST: $68.25
    PST: $95.55
    Total Price w/Discounts: $1,528.79

    Basically … it is an “out of the box” Canada Day Special where they gave me 25% off the price (originally worked to $1,819.97 less 25% = 1,364.99) plus taxes. Shipping is free! The “Basic” model was about $800.00 but, I took the best “out of the box” option of the bunch:

    Intel Core i5 >> upgrade to Intel Core i7
    8GB RAM >> upgraded to 16GB RAM
    1 TB hard drive >> upgraded to 2 TB hard drive!

    E.T.A. for shipment … July 17, 2012!

    I’ll post pictures once it arrives and I unpack the box!

    I happened to mention that my birthday was July 11th and, it would be a great Birthday Present to myself if arrived by then, but Dell said “highly unlikely” … oh well 😀

    Tags: , , ,
  • scissors

    The SimpsonsCurrently, I have 40 Shops @ HART Market (multisites) under the domain HARTmarket.com. In addition to these Shops, I have embedded stores within 3 of my sites .. PetLvr Store, And You Will Store, and the Battling For Health Store. Finally, I have 5 individual domains with e-commerce stores on them similar to the rest .. of which 2 are jointly presented with other people and 2 are basically crappy test sites that I meant to test but haven’t gotten around to!

    With all these stores of mine, you would think that I am making tons of money .. but I am not. In fact, quite the opposite … I’m making tons of nothing!! Well, I do make a little 🙂

    It’s hard NOT to make ~something~ because I am an approved publisher of almost 600 vendors. Most of my stores have been created with the Datafeedr Plugin, which makes it easy to blend a variety of many vendors into a specialized and concentrated store. I’m pretty much hooked into all the major companies … Shareasale, Commission Junction, Google Affiliate Network, Linkshare, Medhealth, Bridalux, Pepperjam, and Clickbank .. as these are the companies that the Datafeedr program supports that I am approved publisher and the vendor has an updated datafeed in place.

    I have quite a few other companies that are not part of these affiliate network .. you see for these companies and those vendors who I am approved vendor, but they do not have an existing datafeed .. well, I have a bunch of rotating 468×60 banners everywhere being randomized, based on the blog your are on!

    By the way … I just figured out why that damn AJAX error was on my sites recently … and fixed it. It was the Tweetboard twitter script that appeared on the left side of each site. No one was using it anyway, so I just removed it and everything should be okay now. Sorry everybody 🙁

    Success and Failure

    For me .. I have to say .. I’ve had the worst success with Linkshare and Pepperjam and Commission Junction … and I still have a HATE-ON for Clickbank (see archives)! I’m actually getting a fair amount of clicks on the CJ products and banners, but no one is buying – and it irritates me to death that I can only see a decent webpage ONLY if I have my Internet Explorer up – instead of using my trusty Firefox broswer.

    All affiliate earnings that I have received since 2008 however, except maybe one $75 cheque from Linkshare, have been from Shareasale. I haven’t really applied to many Google Affiliate Network vendors, although I was approved for about 10 vendors. Quite honestly, I don’t know if I have been generating traffic or clicks to the sites because I haven’t logged in there for ages … well, until this past week that is.

    My Downsizing Strategy

    I have decided effective July 1st, 2010 to stop promoting everything but Shareasale (SAS) and Google Affiliate Network (GAN) products in my stores. If I concentrate on SAS sales .. less choice should gear towards reaching their payout thresholds faster. Adding GAN will be nice, since I get a couple ‘hun per month anyway from Adsense and they pay out regularly on the 26th of the month directly into my bank account – so that’s a bonus!

    Besides downsizing the vendors .. I also plan to downsize the products. Currently, although I personally like concentrated sites of similar products .. it seems to be the general consensus that my having anywhere from 300 to 10,000 products in one single store is not good – and, I shouldn’t have more than 50-100 top primo selected products!

    So .. with the existing shops that I do have, I will be modifying each store (probably in alphabetical order) to only the top selected products and categories.

    My Upsizing Strategy

    So my existing 40 Shops @ HART Market should hopefully have no more than 100 products in there by the end of July. However .. there are are many opportunities out there and I also plan to continue growing with more stores. Some may only have 5-10 products, and others may have 25-50 or so and I still have about 60 ideas from when I first started that I could create with up to 100 products in them.

    I will be sticking to my original gameplan .. to keep adding new stores until I hit 50. Then, I’ll either start another domain and community of shops .. (if it affects CPU resources on my server that is) or continue to 100 shops.

    Other Wishes and Dream Cookies

    Well .. if I can manage the above by the end of July 2010 .. I also want to clone myself, figure out a way to work 40 hours in a 24 hour time period, stop all war and bring peace to the world, feed all the hungry children save all the unwanted pets … and well, winning the lottery would be nice too.

    And Now For Something Completely Different

    … no, not Monty Python .. South Park’s “The Dreidel Song” of the episode of South Park episode “Mr Hankey Classics” (hopefully I can get the SHOPS @ HART Market back on track by Christmas!

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  • scissors
    December 12th, 2009HARTHmmmm Things

    I must have received a gabillion comments in moderation from this IP address by now … IP: 89.28.114.111 … and every comment in moderation has some reference or spelling similar to Viagra .. I thought I would post some of these comments in here for a laugh!

    * I can not solve. Wanna good joke? What do you get when you have a cow and a duck? Milk and quackers.

    * I apologise, but, in my opinion, you are not right. I am assured. Write to me in PM. I have a nice fresh joke for you people) What time is it when the clock strikes 13? Time to get the clock fixed.

    * I have read a good joke in internet 😉 What is Beethoven doing in his coffin right now? Decomposing.

    * I have a fresh joke for you) How do you keep a bagel from getting away? Put lox on it!

    * Nice joke! What do you get when you cross a pit bull with a collie? A dog that runs for help, after he bites your leg off.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Why did the chicken cross the playground? To get to the other slide.

    * A JOKE! ) What do you get if you cross a giant and a vampire? A BIG pain in the neck!

    * A joke for you! Did you hear about the pregnant bedbug? She had her baby in the spring.

    * Wanna very nice joke?)) Why can’t a woman ask her brother for help? Because he can’t be a brother and assist her too.

    * Nice joke! How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb? Are you kidding? That’s a hardware problem!

    * Fresh joke! Why does Santa have 3 gardens? So he can ho-ho-ho.

    * I have a fresh joke for you) What do snowmen eat for breakfast? Snowflakes.

    * I have a nice joke. What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

    * Oh, good joke) Why did the bunnies go on strike? They wanted a raise in celery.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! What do you call an artificial stone? A shamrock.

    * Wanna good joke? Why does a turtle live in a shell? Because it can’t afford an apartment.

    * Wanna very nice joke?)) Where did the vegetables go to get drunk? The Salad Bar.

    * Oh, good joke) What happens to illegally parked frogs? They get toad away.

    * I have a nice joke for you) What kind of coffee was served on the Titanic? Sanka.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Why is a bell obedient? It rings only when it is TOLLED!

    * I have a fresh joke for you) A neutron goes into a barber shop and asks the barber, “How much for a haircut?” The barber replies, “For you, no charge.”

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 Did you hear about the new restaurant that opened in India? It’s a New Delhicatessen.

    * Wanna very nice joke?)) What did the Scotsman do when he couldn’t find a pair of pants? He kilt himself.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Did you hear about the bandit that held up a Chinese restaurant? Half an hour later he was broke.

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 What do you call a frightened scuba diver? Chicken of the sea.

    * Sorry, for off top, i wanna tell one joke) What does a dog get when it finishes obedience school? A pet degree.

    * I have a nice joke for you) What did the Scotsman do when he couldn’t find a pair of pants? He kilt himself.

    * I have a joke for you =) What geometric figure represents a lost parrot? A polygon.

    * A JOKE! ) What did one ocean say to the other ocean? Nothing, they just waved.

    * Sorry, for off top, i wanna tell one joke) What do you call a boomerang that doesn’t work? A stick.

    * I have a nice joke for you) What do you get when you drop boiling water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies.

    * I have a joke for you =) What farm animal is a cannibal? A Cow, it eats it’s fodder!

    * I have a nice joke for you) What did the elephant say to the naked man? How can you breathe through that?

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Which side of a dog has the most hair? The outside.

    * A joke for you peoples! What is the difference between a fisherman and a lazy schoolboy? One baits his hook, while the other hates his book.

    * A joke for you peoples! What did one cloned sheep say to the other? I am ewe.

    * When you order frogs legs at a restaurant what do they do with the rest of the frog ? – Well surely they just throw the rest of the frog away and take it to the tip.

    * Nice joke! Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because there were no chickens in those times.

    * A joke for you! What day does a fish hate? Fry day.

    * I have a nice joke for you people! 🙂 How can you tell if a planet is married? It has a ring around it.

    * A JOKE! ) What’s the difference between an oral thermometer and a rectal thermometer? The taste.

    * I have a joke for you =) How do you get a frog off the back window of your car? Use the rear defrogger.

    * Oh, good joke) Why is a turkey more evil than a chicken? Because a turkey is always a gobblin (a goblin)

    * I have a joke for you =) How can you make a slow horse fast? Stop feeding him!!

    * I have a fresh joke for you) What has four legs, is big, green, furry, and if it fell out of a tree would kill you? A pool table.

    * Wanna joke?) Why did the garbage look sad? Because it was down in the dumps.

    * Nice joke! What do you call a day that follows two days of rain? Monday.

    * I have read a good joke in internet 😉 What do ghouls wear on their feet in the rain?!? GHOULOSHES!!!

    * Nice joke! What has more lives than a cat? A frog. It croaks every night.

    * A joke for you peoples! What do you call a nun who walks in her sleep? A roaming Catholic.

    * I have a joke for you =) What do sea monsters eat for lunch? Fish and ships.

    * A joke for you peoples! What’s happening when you hear “woof…splat…meow…splat?” It’s raining cats and dogs.

    * A joke for you peoples! What city has the largest rodent population? Hamsterdam.

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 What is the most popular wine at Christmas? “Can’t we open the presents yet?”

    * I have a nice joke. Samantha: Doctor, my son thinks that he is a TV channel changer. What are the odds that you can save him? Doctor: Remote!!

    * Wanna joke?) What did one rabbit say to the other rabbit? Nothing. Rabbits can’t talk.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! What type of fish play poker? Card sharks.

    * I have a nice joke for you people! 🙂 What lies at the bottom of the ocean and twitches? A nervous wreck.

    * I have a nice fresh joke for you people) Why is an evil witch like a candle? They are both WICKED

    * Wanna joke?) What do you get when you drop boiling water down a rabbit hole? Hot cross bunnies.

    * I have a nice joke for you) Why do elephants trumpet? They don’t know how to play the violin.

    * I have a nice joke for you people! 🙂 Why does Santa Claus go down the chimney on Christmas Eve?Because it SOOTS him!

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Who is Dracula’s favorite person on the baseball team? The BAT boy!

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 What did the sailor say when he saw a boat loaded with ewes? Sheep ahoy!

    * How much money would an average college philosopher make?

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 Why did Willie Nelson get hit by a car? He was playing on the road again.

    * Fresh joke! Why do carpenters believe that there is no such thing as stone? Because they never SAW it!!

    * Good joke 🙂 Did you hear about the butcher who accidentally backed into the meat grinder? He got a little behind in his work.

    * A JOKE! ) What do you get when you play a country music song backward? You get your wife back, you get your job back, you stop drinking …

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! What kind of music do ghosts listen to? Sheet music.

    * A joke for you peoples! The dreaded Amish flu: First you get a little hoarse. Then you get a little buggy.

    * I have a nice joke for you) What do you call Santa’s helpers? Subordinate Clauses.

    * I have a good fresh joke for you! Where does satisfaction come from? A satisfactory.

    * I have read a good joke in internet 😉 Why did the man put wheels on his rocking chair? He wanted to rock and roll.

    * Good joke 🙂 What’s the difference between ignorance and apathy? I don’t know and I don’t care.

    * I have a joke for you =) What is the difference between a photocopier and the whooping cough? One makes facsimiles and the other makes sick families.

    * I have a nice joke for you) What insect does well in school? A spelling bee.

    * I have a nice fresh joke for you people) Where does the Lone Ranger take his garbage? Ta da dump, ta da dump, ta da dump Dump DUMP!!!

    * Fresh joke! Why is a bell obedient? It rings only when it is TOLLED!

    * Do you want a joke? 🙂 How do crazy people go through the forest? They take the psycho path.

    Tags: ,
  • scissors
    November 18th, 2009HARTHmmmm Things, reorganization

    The father of an 11-year child on Facebook has given me some concern to rethink my “Facebook” activity. The father is a “Friend” in real life and his children is on facebook and they also “Friend”‘ed me.

    In conversation with the father yesterday, he mentioned that the child was concerned because he didn’t want to hurt my feelings .. apparently I am spamming him! He is just getting started on Facebook, and although he might have over 100 friends himself .. I’m his only friend that posts more than once a day.

    Actually – I just looked – over one 24 hour period – I have published 23 posts on Facebook! I think looking backwards and forward, the posts in any given day could amount between 20-35 extra posts, depending on how much extra time I have to write and create new content and promote them!

    As you can see there are a lot of posts! Of the 23 posts .. 8 of them are manually posted by me either on Facebook, or via Twitter which is posted automatically to twitter. The rest are automated posts to my twitter account either directly from my blogs and their feeds, and/or manually posted from my SU.PR account which, posts to Facebook and Twitter separately, so when the twitter post goes through – it posts twice to Facebook! (There were 2 instances of this above).

    I’m guessing that probably NONE of them really were really interesting to my Friend’s 11-year old child and while we are friends and able to keep in touch in Facebook, I don’t expect him to be a reader of my blogs et al.

    My plan is to get my content out there .. to market my stuff, market myself, and find new traffic. But, I already know that I am on the cutting edge with my blogs. I monetize them to the max. I try to promote the posts to the max. I have a popup trying to obtain newsletter subscribers to the max. I post all of my posts directly to twitter to the max. I’m a “Maxxie” type of guy!! (my Papillon dog is named Maxxie! :D)

    Well .. good news – I don’t have my @HARTmarket twitter account posting here to Facebook. If I did .. it would post another 60-70 more posts a day!!

    About Facebook Fan Pages

    I’ve been on Facebook for a while, and have a slew of friends without even using Facebook (or, was that a gaggle of friends? a flock of friends?) Anyway, When I finally decided that I really wanted FAN Pages and set up 5 fan pages for each section of my network of blog sites … I really did not know what to do with my “Personal Account” to which the fan pages are attached to! At first, I had all these NEW friend requests, and ignored them hoping to only get fans. But, I wanted to follow people back, and they do not all have Fan pages themselves! If I were to follow interesting people on Facebook, then I would have to add them as a friend to do that. The next thing you know, I just started accepting all friend requests and even sought out friends myself!

    Something Has To Be Done

    In the next week or so, I am going to try figuring out a better way to not spam my Facebook readers, while still trying to get the word out – so to speak. I think I learned my lesson now. I have only been tying into the Facebook crowd since post-summer 2009 and have a lot to figure out. Questions that I am concerned with right now are:

    1) Do I really need to replicate twitter updates over on facebook?
    2) Do I really want to replicate twitter updates over on facebook?

    Granted, I might have a lot more sites than the average person on Facebook, but how do other people manage their facebook profiles?

    Feel free to offer me some sage advice, tips and suggestions! // Thanks… HART

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    November 6th, 2009HARTHART-Empire Network

    72782-08879-p02pI normally print my own business cards. The template is on MS Publisher and I print them on Avery Clean Edge glossy business cardthem on my G85 All-In-One printer, maybe 5 sheets at a time. I never really wanted to print more than a small handfull, because it seems like at least once every 6-8 months something happens .. a new toll-free fax number, I drop my cell phone and transfer my home number to my cell .. etc etc.

    Here is my existing business card for HBS Management Consultants:

    The last time I needed business cards desperately, I ran out of the clean edge stock, and just used the heavier stock paper that normally use for covers on financial statements … resulting in these yellow cards that I may (or may not have) cut quite unprofessionally with dull scissors or worse!

    HBSMC Business Card 2009 001

    Buying My Business Cards Online

    Overnight_Prints_LogoLast week I decided to try an online printing company … OverNightPrints.com .. and get a new business card without my phone number, and more for internet ventures than my offline ventures. It is a hi-glossy finish, double sided, and has my toll-free fax line, my email address, my site URL’s, my twitter address and my facebook address.

    Date Ordered: October 29, 2009
    Cost: $39.95 USD
    Shipping: $18.77 USD (standard to Canada)
    Total: $58.72 USD
    Date Arrived: November 5, 2009
    Additional Costs: $36.19 CDN (PST, GST and brokerage)

    If I were to convert that to the going foreign exchange rate of 1.0705, these 500 business cards would probably ‘net me $99.05 CDN. or just under 20 cents CDN per single card. Is that a little high? Perhaps .. but it’s not like I’m dropping these on windshields or in mailboxes around the neighbourhood – I’m handing them out to people curious about my online business ventures and/or ask me for my email address. I think it’s a reasonable cost. I did not want to buy 50,000 business cards just to reduce the average unit cost, because I would never get rid of them.

    Here is my new business card

    HART-Empire Network Business Cards 2009 004

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    October 9th, 2009HARTHART-Empire Network

    You might be seeing a new author around my network of sites … “HART KAHUNA” .. that’s me!

    Well, actually, that isn’t me – it’s an automated service providing my blog with fresh content .. for Free!

    Bloggers – Get FREE Content For Your Blogs

    I’m trying Syndicate Kahuna on a few blogs – in particular, blogs that have been dormant or to prevent a blog from being dormant. For instance, on the “And You Will” blog I have a little store included and drip feeding product selections (books) into the blog automatically. Currently, there is no full time writer on this blog anymore, and I wanted some fresh content to mix in with the store content. This is a great alternative for me than (1) hiring another full-time writer or (2) writing fresh content every day myself.

    How Does It Work?

    There is no cost to the blogger using the service and content. I have included an affiliate link with the banner et al because authors have to PAY to submit content to Syndicate Kahuna and if you are an author and go through my link, I might earn a little commission. This is a quality HUMAN edited service that make sure that that quality of the content coming in, is also going out to quality sites (like mine! :D). This assures the author that their links included in the articles do generate GOOD backlinks for them. Reading the site’s Terms of Service, I’m unsure whether or not I am technically allowed to modify the content – I PRESUME THAT I AM ABLE TO – as long as the links are left in tact. This way, like PLR articles, if I had the time, I could change the title of the article and reword it in a way and manner suitable to my liking and tone of voice. However, I’m quite lazy and if I did that – I would have a stack full of Draft posts needing to be edited.

    The identical articles may be found in other sites, but they will limit the number of blogs they will redistribute content. But, it’s not like the free ezine article sites that distribute everywhere and have those resource box endings that stuff keywords and adds an extra 200 words to your post! For my “And You Will” blog, with the automated drip feeds and now the automated syndicate kahuna articles .. I will still occasionally go into the blog and provide additional and original content myself just to mix it up a little more for the google bots!

    How To Use Syndicate Kahuna

    Inside the website there is a list of “Sites Needed” ..
    kahuna-sites-needed

    If you are a writer, you can see that there is a need for articles to be distributed to people wanting content on women’s world, fun stuff, other, writing and speaking, etc etc. There may be opportunities for you to write articles and submit and get many backlinks to your site if you are an authority on these topics!

    For bloggers like me, I would look at the bottom of the list and see that there are many articles available per site like mine, under technology and gadgets, food and drink, and insurance topics. This will give me an opportunity to find selected topical articles that may be suitable for my blog because you can specify specific keywords that articles must have before any are selected for you. I thought I would do a mini-tutorial here, how I would go about selecting content for a brand new site in my network.

    Tutorial: Case Study How To Syndicate Content With Syndicate Kahuna

    For my “TEST” .. I thought I would try this on The Beef Jerky Shop @ HART Market because it is the first store in alphabetical order that is food related (ratio of 18.3 articles available per blog).

    * Step One: Create an author with “Author Permissions” on the blog in question. You probably do not want to use a password you generally use for this . You also have to go into your “Settings” and then “Writing” and enable/tick the box for “Enable the WordPress, Movable Type, MetaWeblog and Blogger XML-RPC publishing protocols”.

    * Step Two: Log into Syndicate Kahuna and go to: “My Sites”, then click the “Welcome” link. There is a link below their step 6, just after the “if you don’t want to mess with uploading the script” part. Set up the details of your site, URL and author username and password that you just created.

    * Step Three: Select the category that you want the article to be selected (it looks like the above image) .. For this case, I have ticked the box “Food and Drink” but, I can select up to 10 categories .. so I have decided to ALSO tick the boxes “Fun Stuff” and “Health and Fitness”. Click ‘next’ button.

    * Step Four: Assign categories – this is already tied in directly with your blog, and you should see all of your categories. In this case, I created a new category called “Beef Jerky Notes” although, on my “And You Will” blog I integrated this into the various existing categories that I have over there.

    * Step Five: Add Keywords and keyword phrases – As you can see, I don’t want any old food and drink article thrown on my site .. just related to the store topic – which is Beef Jerky.
    kahuna-keywords

    * Step Six: Select Your Post Settings – I already have 2 posts a day on this and each blog that I have, so I will select only 1 post per day maximum, and “Publish” it immediately. The alternative post status was to save “Pending Review” if I wanted to review it more closely. What I have decided to do is publish immediately, and if the content is not what I want – redo the keyword section or, add keywords to exclude etc.
    kahuna-post-options

    * Step Seven: Add Site > you’re done!

    Feel free to follow my progress with articles in the “Beef Jerky Notes” category to see how this shapes up over the next little while.

    Thanks!
    HART

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    August 30th, 2009HARTHmmmm Things

    This is a TRUE Story. After reading and following the timeline of HART and the INTERNET, you can only come to ONE CONCLUSION! This is HART’s official entry in BlogCatalog’s Give Away contest to Blog World and New Media Expo 2009 .. and HART needs to win .. HART *must* win! 😀

    BACKGROUND INFORMATION

    15,000,000,000 BC

    – The “Big Bang” Theory
    – The universe was created so HART could fulfill his destiny

    3000 BC to 2500 BC

    – Construction of the Egyptian pyramids at Gizeh

    2500 BC

    – Stonehenge was built

    BIRTH OF THE INTERNET

    January 1995

    – Discovers something called “The Internet”

    March 1995

    – signs up with Compuserve

    July 1995

    – realized what a douche Compuserve was and obtains own host provider and 56k dial-up service

    August 24, 1995

    – win95 was released to the world and becomes HART’s preferred operating software

    September 1995

    – HART creates his award winningHART’s Homepage

    November 30, 1996

    – HART travels around the world from Winnipeg, Manitoba to London UK to meet internet friends for fun and gathering

    December 3, 1996

    – HART visits Stonehenge, after being mugged on a train on his first night in London UK, and miraculously finds his passport and belongings returned in another city 100 miles away with a letter from the mugger that said: “I like Canadians .. you guys are smart not to carry your money with your passport. Here is yours back. Cheers.”

    March 8, 1997

    – While watching A&E or the TLC channel history of the construction of the Egyptian pyramids at Gizeh, a woman named Yvonne decides to initiate a chat with HART on PowWow

    August 31, 2002

    HARTandYvonne.com was created to memoralize HART and YVONNE’s medieval wedding on this date

    FORMATION OF THE HART-EMPIRE NETWORK

    May 31, 2005

    – HART’s first blog, PetLvr.blogspot.com/ was created

    July 14, 2005

    – HART moves everything from Blogger to his own servers and to become PetLvr.com/blog/ and begins creating multiple blogs and websites and starts to build and ’empire’ online

    August 10, 2005

    – HART creates a profile and joins Blog Catalog directory

    October 16, 2005

    – HART creates the HART-Empire Network and officially embarks on to build up his blogging empire
    – Coincidentally, the birth of the HART-Empire Network and subsequent anniversaries fall directly in the middle of the famed BlogWorld New Media Expo conference, of which had solicited the HART-Empire Network to join and participate in an exhibit since 2006 and subsequent years

    July 2006

    – During rapid expansion of the HART-Empire Network, HART experiences growing pains and while a mega account containing 5 major blogs starts becoming a burden, HART moves all the expansion blogs to new hosting service plans.

    November 10, 2006

    – Joins MyBlogLog and discovers that a social community will be the future of forums and other catalog and directories, and creates a popular presence and standing in the community

    Sometime in January 2007

    – BlogCatalog is purchased from those bloggy guys and is under new ownership. In addition to a directory, there seems to be growing activity in a forum type of website

    May 13, 2007

    HART gives up all social communities online and decides to concentrate on the blogging

    May 13, 2007 at 11:59am

    Antony Berkman from BlogCatalog personally requests to HART …
    ” Don’t leave blogcatalog. We love a community made of characters. Check out the new discussions…. you’d be a welcome addition blogcatalog.com/discuss
    – (and HART never left!)

    July 2007

    – Receiving growing pains again, HART Consolidates all host providers into one single dedicated Server, at substantially higher fixed costs, however the upgrade solved a lot of downtime problems due to excess CPU Resources bringing the server down (not traffic levels).

    August 30, 2007

    – the HART-Empire Network impresses thegoodknife

    September 27, 2007

    – HART and the PetLvr Blog unites with bloggers around the world blogging against animal abuse and receives one of five honorable mentions of all the bloggers around the world contributing to this worthy cause by Copywrite, Ink

    March 24, 2008

    – TonyB commented on BlogCatalog that the HART-Empire Network was on the verge of going big, and enquired if I was going to SOBcon08

    August 31, 2008

    – HART receives an extended 3-month upgrade to his existing membership here at BlogCatalog for his excellent suggestion and valuable input to the betterment of the community

    September 3, 2008

    – TonyB is desperate for HART to find a way to make it to BlogWorld Expo Sep20-21/08, although timing just was not right – again in 2008, as it was in 2007

    October 16, 2008

    – HART and the PetLvr Blog participates in the first annual Pet ‘Net Adoption Event

    January 4, 2009

    – After registering record gross revenues for the calendar year ended December 31, 2008 .. HART still reflects whether or not it cost him NOT to go to any SOBcon events, BlogWorldExpo events, or any other blogging events during the year and reflects on the results over the next few months.

    March 1, 2009

    – The HART-Empire Network consolidates 16 health blogs into one mega BattlingForHealth.com blog

    April 1, 2009

    – The HART-Empire Network consolidates 12 do-it-yourself improvement blogs into one mega AndYouWill.com blog

    August 6, 2009

    – While away on summer vacation, during a typical Manitoba summer day (NSFW), and assessing the HART-Empire Network and its finances, HART recognizes that although traffic levels were maintained over the past 7 months in 2009, revenues have declined by approximately 30% since the consolidation of the 28 blogs into 2 mega blogs.

    August 19, 2009

    – BlogCatalog announces that they are Giving Away Full Access Pass to BlogWorld 2009 which includes a free 3-day, full access pass (valued at $1,195) for this year’s event being held October 15-17, 2009 in Las Vegas, NV… PLUS 1 million ad impressions for your blog on BlogCatalog!

    August 30, 2009

    – HART (aka PetLvr on BlogCatalog) decides to enter BlogCatalog’s contest entry with this post as his official entry.

    CLAIRVOYANT PREDICTIONS

    Friday September 19, 2009

    – Blogcatalog announces that HART (aka PetLvr on BlogCatalog) wins the grand prize of a 3-day full access pass for BlogWorld & New Media Expo 2009, and a dinner in Las Vegas with the BlogCatalog team!
    – HART scrambles around trying to raise money to pay for travel and hotel expenses to be able to learn and meet many smart bloggers and new media personnel that will be in attendance.

    October 15-17, 2009 in Las Vegas

    – HART has the time of his life in Las Vegas and … (oops, can’t say … what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas)
    – October 17, 2009 – HART remembers to call his folks to wish them a Happy Anniversary

    October 19, 2009

    – HART starts first thing Monday morning with STAGE TWO of the life and times of the HART-Empire Network

    January 3, 2011

    – HART reports the largest and most success year ever! for the HART-Empire Network, with one of the largest list of online and offline friends one can have!

    December 21, 2012

    – Who would have thought … but, in the Bizzaro World, the forecast based primarily on what is claimed to be the end-date of the Mesoamerican Long Count calendar, which is presented as lasting 5,125 years and as terminating on December 21 or 23, 2012, along with interpretations of assorted legends, scriptures, numerological constructions and prophecies .. actually happened! Bizzaro World is destroyed by a meteor.
    – Hello.

    December 22, 2012

    – On our planet Earth, everything is alright and everybody prepares to have a safe and happy Holiday season!
    – Goodbye.

    This is HART’s official entry in BlogCatalog’s Give Away contest to Blog World and New Media Expo 2009.

    In the event that HART is awarded this prize, and unable to finance this venture (travel and hotel etc), HART will give away any free prize at the earliest convenience to a lucky and regular reader of the HART-Empire Network.

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